We all have things in our lives that ground us. It’s the familiarity of drinking from our favourite mug in the morning or following a specific route to work. For most of us, these habits are just background noise. We rarely stop to think about them as they come to us so naturally. But for someone living with dementia, these habits are important and hold power.
When the world starts to feel scary and confusing, routine becomes a secret language, a way of giving reassurance and letting them know that they are safe. Routine is a way of finding stability in the world of dementia.
The Power of Familiarity
People with dementia are usually in a state of heightened alertness. It is terrifying to not know where one is or what will happen next. This is where familiarity comes in and helps reduce this anxiety and makes it a bit easier to face the world.
- Familiarity is the natural enemy of anxiety: When a person recognizes the smell of breakfast at the same time or the sound of a specific radio show, their nervous system begins to relax.
- Muscle Memory: While names or dates might fade, the procedural memory or the how to memory often stays strong. By turning to familiar habits, the body begins to take over and the brain doesn’t have to panic about “what’s next” because the hands and feet already know the way.
Structure: A Compass for Orientation
“Disorientation” or the loss of awareness regarding time, place or identity is one of the most difficult and distressing parts of dementia. Hence, a consistent daily structure acts as a compass and allows a person to navigate and orient their own life.
- Without a proper routine and schedule, Monday can feel like Saturday, and 3 PM can feel like midnight. Therefore, A structured routine involving activities like a morning walk, lunch at a specific place, afternoon music etc. creates time-stamps that help a person orient themselves within the day.
- Having a routine helps reduce the number of choices that one needs to make. Instead of being unsure about what to do, the environment and the clock provide the answer, allowing your loved one to simply be rather than struggle
The Sundown Effect
If you’ve spent time with someone with dementia, you’ve likely seen the changes that happen as the day progresses and the sun begins to set. The state of increased confusion and agitation that is experienced in the transition from daylight to darkness is called sundowning and can bring on a wave of pacing, anxiety, or a sudden, desperate urge to “go home,” even if they are already there.
Routine acts as a gentle buffer here. By creating a predictable ritual or routine like drawing the curtains at 4:00 PM or serving a familiar comfort snack, you create a sensory signal. You are telling their nervous system that the day is closing safely, and there is nothing to fear. The nervous system thus relaxes and anxiety is reduced.
Conclusion
The most important thing to remember is that a routine is not a military drill or a rulebook. It’s not about the clock but the feeling. On some days, the routine might just be sitting together and listening to a favorite song and on other days, it might involve a full walk. The goal isn’t to check off a to-do list but to create a world that feels recognizable. By building a rhythmic life, you are building a sanctuary. You are giving your loved one a map to a world that makes sense again, one familiar cup of tea at a time.
Looking for Compassionate Parent Care?
If you or your loved ones are seeking a safe, nurturing, and dignified environment for elderly parents, VataVriksh Parent Care is here to help.
- Explore our Parent Care services
- Schedule a visit or consultation
- Let us help your parents rediscover comfort, care, and peace
Written by:
Aditi Singh
Psychology Intern, VataVriksh Parent Care
Psychology Student, Kamala Nehru College, University of Delhi
Edited and Reviewed by Dr Subodh Kumar, Project Director & Cognitive Psychologist at VataVriksh Parent Care
